tekimetexeng | [ reverie inbox ]

[ Interesting. He hadn't, and yet he'd stayed quiet so far? Because he didn't think it was his "place"? Naomi frowns a little, fingers curling into her bedding tensely. ]

I don't see why it wouldn't be. You may not have known them as long, but you still care. Of course they deserve to know. Maybe the time will never feel right here, and I should just get it over with even if they wouldn't trust me at all anymore. I did mean to explain, it's been... a weight. One that's only gotten worse in this place.

[ She tilts her head a little, expression losing its resolve. ]

Is unburdening one's soul worth being cast out? Worth their pain as well?

I care, but I'm — ( what is he? a guest on the rocinante. this seems to be a crew-internal matter and he's along for the ride, grateful that they're helping him find his daughter. grateful that holden has gotten over himself and his obsession with the hybrids to realise that what matters are people. grateful for amos who's been on his side the entire time. grateful for alex who's been going along with it.

not so grateful to naomi for wanting to go to tycho instead of io, though he understands that, too. why should she risk her life for his daughter? but then, she doesn't remember that, does she? it's confusing and it's terrible. )

More of a guest. ( he settles on, after a moment. )

How much worse will it be if they find out you've been keeping this from them all this time?

( that's not a thread, but —secrets have a way of biting you in the butt when you least want them to, don't they? )

A guest...?

[ Interesting. It's probably true -- Prax really isn't suited for work on a ship, and everyone's expecting that once he finds Mei he'll resettle. But still, she wouldn't have called him a guest. She would have called him a friend, even if he doesn't think much of her specifically. He's a friend to the others. ]

...it'll be worse. But I think it'll be bad enough to start with that time here is a drop of water in an already full pail.

[ She's already expecting the worst, to never be forgiven. Kicked off the ship at the first opportunity and probably never spoken to again by any of them. Not for a long time if ever. Amos especially... well. ]

It just seems crueler to tell them now, when we're stuck together.

( he doesn't think holden considers him a friend. holden used him and now he feels guilty about that. prax doesn't blame him for either of those things, not really, but he doesn't think they're friends. alex —he hadn't really talked to alex a lot, back on the roci. now, here, he considers him a friend. naomi was against going to io, and he can't blame her for that, either, but he doesn't have to like it.

it leaves amos. amos is the one that prax would, without hesitation, call a friend. )

You're probably right about that.

( he gives a slow nod, acceptance. )

[ reverie inbox ]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject